Day 1: The Intake Overload

Generally, Monday mornings are rough for everyone. It's the start of a new work week, usually coming off a weekend and more sleep than usual. That wasn't the case on this Monday. It was time to begin.

After waking up and starting with a cup of coffee (2 spoonfuls of sugar and plenty of creamer of course), I really got going. Pop tarts, 3 eggs, a bowl of Cheerios, another bowl of Cheerios, yet another bowl of Cocoa Krispies and to finish, a couple homemade apple cinnamon pastries.

Lunch wasn't too far around the corner and we were set for a long day out on the boat, and that meant many goodies on-board. Only a few hours later, it was 2 turkey and cheese tortilla wraps, a ham and cheddar on white sandwich, 2 apples, potato chips, pretzel sticks, half a pound of homemade chocolate/peanut butter snacks, 12 ounces of chicken and 16 peanut butter chip cookies later, I was really feeling it.

My reaction at this point, was the ONLY thing I wanted to do was sit there. They say eating a ton of sugar actually kills your energy, and I can definitely relate. I didn't want to burn it off, it didn't make me energetic and want to move around, I wanted to sit there like a slug and not move. I also didn't really want to eat any more, but thanks to the 5 Diet Cokes I had consumed in that six hour period, I had a headache and was still hungry. That meant it was getting close to snack time.

We got home, talked about dinner plans and it was time to start up again. Of course, dinner was still hours away, so we can consider this "snack time", and boy was it. I attacked the containers of the homemade chocolate bars again, this time to a tune of about 15 pieces (each is about the size of a fun-size candy bar). Add to that, a blueberry muffin, a pistachio muffin, another ham/cheese sandwich, 2 packs of regular M&M's, another apple cinnamon pastry, 6 vanilla tootsie rolls (I always loved those things), a handful of Hot Tamales, a few Bit-O-Honey's (not even worth it haha) and probably another thousand calories of random stuff that was laying around. Then I get word that I'm in charge of cooking dinner that night, and although at that point, it didn't sound good, I knew in 2 hours I'd be up and ready for it again.

Leading up to dinner, I sat around, let things "settle", took a shower and then fired up the grill. Cheeseburgers, potato chips and Totino's Pizza Rolls for dinner, made for a champ. The burgers had to be thawed, so as I waited, I indulged in a couple slices of cheddar cheese to hold me over. The smell of the burgers on the grill really made me hungry, especially since I don't eat red meat and haven't in months. After loading each burger with a slab of cheese, I pulled them off the grill and we got ready to eat. I grabbed 2 enriched honey buns, loaded them with ketchup, mustard, lettuce and then added two 6-ounce burgers. Grabbed a dozen pepperoni pizza rolls, a handful of chips, a fresh Diet Coke and dinner was served.

Now they say when you give up red meat, you don't really miss it, but I have to say, I crave a juicy cheeseburger every once in a while. And it certainly hit the spot. So much so, that I had two of them. The dinner followed by another handful of pizza rolls (one of the worst things you can eat considering the calories, sodium, processed items and lack of anything healthy) and another diet coke.

The rest of the night, we were going to play it safe, keep it low key and hang around with the family playing cards. In our family, this also means time to bust out the desserts and snack. As we started playing cards, the goodies emerged. The entire collection of homemade chocolate came out, all three flavors (butterscotch, peanut butter and white chocolate, all mixed with milk chocolate) were popular. I had my share of each, but there were bigger fish to fry. Most notably, buttered popcorn, Twizzlers, peanut butter M&M's, blueberry Pop Tarts and maybe one of the most tasty things of the day, a triple decker peanut butter and jelly sandwich. I don't know why I wanted to make one, but I figured now was the time, so I did do. Despite being completely stuffed, it tasted good. I had to get serious about winning the cards, so dessert went on the back burner for a little while.

It was time for everyone to wind down, get to bed, but I was still a little antsy. I hung around the kitchen for a while, snacked on a few things here and there and decided it was time for a late-night sandwich. This used to be one of my guilty pleasures, snacking on the leftovers before bed, whatever we made that night, pizza, burgers, chicken, anything, would become a late-night snack. I fired up a cheeseburger (cold of course) and loaded it up. Add in a few Ho-ho's, another handful of chocolate and a Diet Coke to end the night, I was actually getting tired. It was fairly easy to retire to the bed, turn on The Wire and fall asleep. I was out like a rock in less than 15 minutes.

Day 1 was over, and after approximately 30,000 unhealthy calories in and the only real physical activity being getting in and out of the boat a few times and walking from the destination to the car a couple of others, it was on to day 2. I wondered before going to sleep if I could do this again, and not so much if I could, but if I wanted to. I already noticed physical changes in my body, even in less than 24 hours, and although the feelings hadn't kicked in quite yet (they wouldn't hit until tomorrow), I got that overwhelming sense that my body was in panic mode. It was just beginning.